As I’m writing this, it’s the day before our son Miles’ 5th birthday, which is a day I remember not only as his entry into the world but also as my initiation into motherhood.
I don’t often share this, but I wasn’t one of those little girls who played with baby dolls as I dreamt of becoming a mother.
I was more prone to playing entrepreneur (charging my cousin to eat at our house at my “Pig Out” Cafe), trying my hand at activism (starting my own chapter of Kids for Saving Earth when I was still in elementary school), and making plans to own my own home with a lush backyard full of trees (growing up surrounded by nature in Oklahoma set the stage for this one).
So when I met the man who would later become my husband, a family man through and through, I thought that I had to choose between continuing down the path I had envisioned when I was little OR choose this new path, with diapers and parenting classes and room parent responsibilities as my sole focus.
What I didn’t realize at the time was that there was another path; one that allowed for the diapers AND my clients, the parenting classes AND speaking out for the causes that are important to me, the responsibilities to schools AND taking care of our home.
Full transparency: making this choice to create space for the both/and in my life isn’t always an easy one, and I have had more moments than I care to admit when I feel like I’m not doing any of it well, for my family OR for my career.
But if there’s one thing I’ve learned from juggling these responsibilities in my life (and from guiding many of my clients to do the same), it’s that beating myself up has never helped things; it only serves to keep us stuck and frankly, pretty miserable.
When our minds get fixated on all that we haven’t accomplished, how we’re handling things wrong, or what isn’t working in our lives, we quite literally don’t have the headspace for the magic that is always there.
On the other hand, when we stop to slow down and become a little more gentle with ourselves, we bring in an expansiveness to our energy that creates space to not only soothe our weary souls, but that also invites in creative solutions we might not have seen before.
Have you paid attention to the energy that was under the choices and actions you’ve taken in your life lately?
If not, I invite you to take a little time to do that today; soften your mind and bring a little more gentleness to your experience and notice how it shifts the choices you make for yourself and toward creating change in this world.
You are not alone…there is always love waiting for you in the stillness.
Believing in the power of you,
In case you missed it, or if you’ve made the conscious choice to step back from social media (a choice I support 100%, by the way!), I led a quick 4 minute guided HypnoReiki meditation in this week’s IGTV; you can watch it here, no Instagram account needed:
Click here for a 4 minute shot of HypnoReiki to soothe your mind and body
This inspiring talk by Elizabeth Gilbert on Facing Fear with Compassion couldn’t be more timely and was a salve for my soul; listen to it by clicking here.